*Note: This post has not been written to offend anyone, or start a debate or anything like that. This is just about my thoughts and feelings and my experiences. I respect other people's opinions and hope that they can respect mine.

Vaccinations are a hard a hard thing for me. I have waffled back and forth on whether or not I should get my children vaccinated. I have read articles and books and seen documentaries on why they are dangerous. I have also read a few articles on why vaccinations are important but so far I have definitely gotten more into the against. At one point Chris and I both said that we weren't going to get our children vaccinated anymore but I still wasn't feeling 100% ok with that decision either. I finally came to the conclusion that I was going to get my kids vaccinated but I was going to wait until they were a little older to get them done as that's what Dr. Oz does, and I figured he was a worthy one to follow. Well, I think I waited too long. About a month ago Chris and I took Aubrey and Jensen to finish up on their vaccines. Aubrey asked me what vaccines were and I didn't want to scare her so I told her they were a surprise. Probably not the best way to put it, but that's what I said. So the day of the vaccinations arrived and everything was hunky-dory, Aubrey and Jensen were happy as could be, chatting with the nurse and everything. We decided to get Aubrey done first because she would put up more of a fight if she saw what vaccinations really were. So I sat and held her down while the nurse stuck her with needle number one. She didn't know what hit her but once she felt the pain, the tears started rolling down her cheeks. Talk about a break your hear moment! I felt terrible. She only had to get one in each arm but by the time she was done she had worked herself up so much she was in hysterics! Jensen was a champ. He cried a bit as the nurse put the needles in (he had to get 3 as he was farther behind on his vaccines) but once it was all over, he was fine. After we left Aubrey reminded me for days afterward that she NEVER EVER wanted to go back to get vaccinations again and she tried to make me promise. I said we would never ever go back for a long time and that seemed to appease her.

Unfortunately I couldn't keep that promise as yesterday I got a phone call from the very nurse that vaccinated my kids explaining that Aubrey needed to get 2 more shots. She thought Aubrey didn't need these shots anymore because of her age but as it turns out she did need them. The nurse asked if I could come back as soon as possible. So the appointment was made for the next day (being today) at 10:30 am. I explained to Aubrey that she and I were going to go out together and that we were going somewhere that she wasn't going to like but after we were done there we could go where ever she wanted and have some fun together. She said she wanted to go to Toys R Us to play in the cars. She loves playing in the power wheels. She kept asking me where we were going first and I just told her I would tell her on the way. Well, this morning on the way to the health clinic, I told her exactly where she was going and why. I thought it would be good to prepare her. That was a mistake. I should have just "surprised" her like last time. Talk about a melt down! "Turn this car around RIGHT NOW and take me home!" she screamed. "I HATE you! (yup, she's learned that phrase) I HATE that lady(referring to the nurse that gave the vaccines)! I hate daddy! I hate Jensen!" She basically went through quite a lengthy list of people, most of whom were some of her very favorite people, and said she hated them. She screamed all the way there, tears streaming down her face. Amazingly, I was able to keep calm the entire time (and I am going to congratulate myself on that because trust me, it is not easy at all to keep calm in a situation like that) and I just kept telling her that it was okay to feel angry and sad and that it was ok to cry but it was not ok to say that you hate people and it was not ok to scream. Too bad it didn't work. I carried her into the health unit and I had to keep her mouth covered as she was screaming. I tried to bribe her with gum, which is her very favorite, but it didn't work. She just kept on screaming. Then she turned to hitting and kicking. At this point I could tell that the nurse was starting to lose her cool. She kept quite calm but very firmly told Aubrey that what she was doing to me was not acceptable. Aubrey only glared at her and kind of scream/growled at her. How embarrassing. Well, I held Aubrey down, she got one shot in each arm and once she was told she was done she started laughing through her tears and turned back into my sweet little girl again. She even told the nurse that she wanted to grow up to be just like her! She also said that she didn't hate anybody, she just loved everybody and that she was sorry for her "poor behavior!" After we waited in the waiting room for a bit we were off to Toys R Us and all has been fine n' dandy since.

Note to self:

• It's ok to wait to vaccinate children but don't wait until they are really aware of what's going on and have a good memory. Sometime before the age of 2 is probably good.
• It is much better to "surprise" them then to prepare them for what is about to happen
• Send dad to be the bad guy. I am the bad guy enough as it is.